Real You: Avoid holiday snarks

Ah, 'tis the season to be stressed. As you begin to haul out all of the seasonal decorations, and scrounge around for new expressions of your tidings of joy, remember to keep the real meaning of the holidays in the center of your heart. It's tough, trust me, I know but it's also essential for your sanity, and for the real you to shine. At the same time, you're approaching year-end at work and all that planning, anticipation, finalization and yes - potential - the looming new year implies. Ah. You need to find the real people in your life, and surround yourself with them and their love this season.

And how do you do that? I've devised what I call the Snark Scale outlined in my book to help categorize the passion poppers in your life and to help you realize we all face them. The key is to cultivate authenticity. The real people in your life share your passions and empower you. If someone isn't supporting you and your passions, they are using you, draining your energy and pulling you down. Remember, you're on a personal mission to be the best Real You. That's not selfish. It's critical if you want to be the best parent, employer, friend, or spouse you can be.

And always remember, the more real you become - the more true to your self - the more polarizing you will find yourself to be. Everybody loves a doormat, but how does the doormat feel?

The holidays are here. Lose the guilt. Ignore the snarks and find the real.

And when you unfurl the holiday doormat, make sure it isn't you!